So is the koi pond up and running yet? Uh… well, not quite yet. What we have right now is more of a festering swamp than a pond.

The crew pumped out most of the rainwater a few days ago but we still have this mosquito-friendly bit left to deal with. Better get on that. Before the hillbillies show up.

So what’s new? Let’s see… feelings of inadequacy. Doubts we can live up to our unbelievably fabulous new patio. And ideas for ways to regain some of that white trash aesthetic we’re so accustomed to. Yup, the upper patio is pretty much done.

Dude.

The boys from Land Design Associates weathered two damp, blustery days to make it happen. I love you guys. They raked out a thick layer of crushed stone base and stone dust, then tamped it down good…

They compacted the heck out of it…

FYI, that’s a screed board being dragged across the surface to make it smooth. Screed. Not scrod. Does not smell like fish.

And then the granite started to go down…

And then more (torrential downpour break!)…

And then just like that, all the stone was in. The seams were filled in with stone dust…

And the whole thing was swept clean. The rectangle by the railing will be the home of the corten steel grill/firepit. More on that another time…

With the patio essentially done, it was time to clean up the yard. The crew raked out the soil and graded the slope so that it wouldn’t be so steep around the pond’s edge…

And then our gorgeous, boulder-free soil was once again revealed.

So this is what we’re left with: a supa-dope patio that looks like it goes with the house and a clean slate for pond-side plants and lawn. (Click to biggify for the full dope…)

Before the crew cleared out of the back area, they brought in two 5′ granite steps for the top of the yard…

I’ve been picturing this little spot as the perfect shady vantage point from which to gaze upon our swank new kingdom from some yet-to-be-determined bench…

Funny. This spot is considerably higher than the pond but the camera just can’t capture that. What it also can’t capture is how psyched I am that the boys also added 4′ stone steps out front where that tree came down last week…

Thank you! New trees coming soon. Also coming soon: the lower patio. But for now, the machinery sleeps.

Yesterday the crew from Land Design Associates came and knocked that pond into shape, finishing off the wall with a granite cap. I’ll make this quick so we can get to the big reveal.

First, they trimmed back the liner, scalloping the edge like it was a giant rubber doily. I assume that’s so the mortar can adhere the cap stones to the cinder block, right?

There were clouds of stone dust…

Much hefting, measuring, slathering of mortar and leveling…

And then…

DONE!

Oooooooh! Aaaaaaaaaaaah! Now we let the mortar harden up and pretend like we’re not already lighting the grill and mixing up a pitcher of sangria.